Want to give your children the best start possible?

Questions develop your children’s minds…ever wonder what questions to ask? Are we always quick to give our children solutions? Just notice how many times you do.

When we ask our children questions, we initiate an internal response from them. This creates the behaviour pattern of problem solving and creativity within them.

A new series called “Questions to ask your child” will be released every Tuesday in my blog. Have fun and try them, I would love to hear your feedback!

One of the most important skills we need to be successful is building good relationships and it all starts on the playground.

My child struggles a bit with making friends (Blog Series 1)

Part 1. Teaching your child what kind of friends to look for.

When our children are not as confident to make friends, how do we encourage them?

1. Start with lots of small conversations about friends – with no expectations of action yet.

I know we just want them to go out there and make friends straight away, but building perceptions around friends can sometimes take a little time. Allow them the time, it will be worth it. These conversations build their awareness and a foundation for developing their courage.

2. Ask them Questions
  • What are the children like in your class?
  • Who do you like?
  • What do you like about them?
  • Who don’t you like?
  • What don’t you like about them?
  • Who would you like to be friends with?
  • What would you get by being friends with them?… and that would make you feel?
  • How would you like your friends to treat you? E.g. do you want them to come up and say hello? Be interested in what you have been doing? Do you want them to care about you? Do you want them to offer help and include you?
  • Who are you friends with? Do they give you this?
  • How do you treat your friends? What do you do?
3. Allow them to have their own perceptions.

When they are young, they won’t have a big picture perception yet, and that is okay. Allow them to go and notice each day and question their own perceptions. Talk to them about their findings with curiosity, not judgement. And yes it is tempting to give them the answers…. stop yourself. Give them the opportunity for self-discovery.

As we start to ask questions there WILL be times where neither of you know what to say. Teach your children that it is okay to not know in the moment. Our brains continue to ask the questions as we continue in our day and the answers come.

I look forward to your feedback! What worked? Where did you get stuck?

Next week we will continue with this theme and talk about – Developing the courage to initiate friendship – the first conversation. 

Click to see Part 2
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